Asmaa Bint Abu Bakr
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 Asmaa Bint Abu Bakr
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Asmaa bint Abu Bakr belonged to a distinguished Muslim family. Her father, Abu
Bakr, was a close friend of the Prophet and the first Khalifah after his death.
Her half- sister, A'ishah, was a wife of the Prophet and one of the Ummahat
al-Mu 'm ineen. Her husband, Zubayr ibn al- Awwam, was one of the special
personal aides of the Prophet. Her son, Abdullah ibn az-Zubayr, became well-
known for his incorruptibility and his unswerving devotion to Truth.

Asmaa herself was one of the first persons to accept Islam. Only about
seventeen persons including both men and women became Muslims before her. She
was later given the nickname Dhat an-Nitaqayn (the One with the Two Waistbands)
because of an incident connected with the departure of the Prophet and her
father from Makkah on the historic hijrah to Madinah.

Asmaa was one of the few persons who knew of the Prophet's plan to leave for
Madinah. The utmost secrecy had to be maintained because of the Quraysh plans
to murder the Prophet. On the night of their departure, Asmaa was the one who
prepared a bag of food and a water container for their journey. She did not
find anything though with which to tie the containers and decided to use her
waistband or nitaq. Abu Bakr suggested that she tear it into two. This she did
and the Prophet commended her action. From then on she became known as "the One
with the Two Waistbands".

When the final emigration from Makkah to Madinah took place soon after the
departure of the Prophet, Asmaa was pregnant. She did not let her pregnancy or
the prospect of a long and arduous journey deter her from leaving. As soon as
she reached Quba on the outskirts of Madinah, she gave birth to a son,
Abdullah. The Muslims shouted AllaXu Akbar (God is the Greatest) and Laa ilaaha
illa Allah (There is no God but Allah) in happiness and thanksgiving because
this was the first child to be born to the muhajireen in Madinah.

Asmaa became known for her fine and noble qualities and for the keenness of her
intelligence. She was an extremely generous person. Her son Abdullah once said
of her, "I have not seen two women more generous than my aunt A'ishah and my
mother Asmaa. But their generosity was expressed in different ways. My aunt
would accumulate one thing after another until she had gathered what she felt
was sufficient and then distributed it all to those in need. My mother, on the
other hand, would not keep anything even for the morrow."

Asmaa's presence of mind in difficult circumstances was remarkable. When her
father left Makkah, he took all his wealth, amounting to some six thousand
dirhams, with him and did not leave any for his family. When Abu Bakr's father,
Abu Quhafah (he was still a mushrik) heard of his departure he went to his
house and said to Asmaa:

"I understand that he has left you bereft of money after he himself has
abandoned you."

"No, grandfather," replied Asmaa, "in fact he has left us much money." She took
some pebbles and put them in a small recess in the wall where they used to put
money. She threw a cloth over the heap and took the hand of her grandfather
--he was blind--and said, "See how much money he has left us".

Through this strategem, Asmaa wanted to allay the fears of the old man and to
forestall him from giving them anything of his own wealth. This was because she
disliked receiving any assistance from a mushrik even if it was her own
grandfather.

She had a similar attitude to her mother and was not inclined to compromise her
honour and her faith. Her mother, Qutaylah, once came to visit her in Madinah.
She was not a Muslim and was divorced from her father in preIslamic times. Her
mother brought her gifts of raisins, clarified butter and qaraz (pods of a
species of sant tree). Asmaa at first refused to admit her into her house or
accept the gifts. She sent someone to A'ishah to ask the Prophet, peace be upon
him, about her attitude to her mother and he replied that she should certainly
admit her to her house and accept the gifts. On this occasion, the following
revelation came to the Prophet:

"God forbids you not, with regard to those who do not fight you because of your
faith nor drive you out of your homes, from dealing kindly and justly with
them. God loves those who are just. God only forbids you with regard to those
who fight you for your Faith, and drive you from your homes, and support others
in driving you out, from turning to them (for friendship and protection). It is
such as turn to them (in these circumstances) that do wrong."
(Surah al-Mumtahanah 60: 8-9).

For Asmaa and indeed for many other Muslims, life in Madinah was rather
difficult at first. Her husband was quite poor and his only major possession to
begin with was a horse he had bought. Asmaa herself described these early days:

"I used to provide fodder for the horse, give it water and groom it. I would
grind grain and make dough but I could not bake well. The women of the Ansar
used to bake for me. They were truly good women. I used to carry the grain on
my head from az-Zubayr's plot which the Prophet had allocated to him to
cultivate. It was about three farsakh (about eight kilometres) from the town's
centre. One day I was on the road carrying the grain on my head when I met the
Prophet and a group of Sahabah. He called out to me and stopped his camel so
that I could ride behind him. I felt embarrassed to travel with the Prophet and
also remembered az-Zubayr's jealousy--he was the most jealous of men. The
Prophet realised that I was embarrassed and rode on."

Later, Asmaa related to az-Zubayr exactly what had happened and he said, "By
God, that you should have to carry grain is far more distressing to me than
your riding with (the Prophet)".

Asmaa obviously then was a person of great sensitivity and devotion. She and
her husband worked extremely hard together until their situation of poverty
gradually changed. At times, however, az-Zubayr treated her harshly. Once she
went to her father and complained to him about this. His reply to her was: "My
daughter, have sabr for if a woman has a righteous husband and he dies and she
does not marry after him, they will be brought together again in Paradise."

Az-Zubayr eventually became one of the richest men among the Sahabah but Asmaa
did not allow this to corrupt her principles. Her son, al-Mundhir once sent her
an elegant dress from Iraq made of fine and costly material. Asmaa by this time
was blind. She felt the material and said, "It's awful. Take it back to him".

Al-Mundhir was upset and said, "Mother, it was not transparent."

"It may not be transparent," she retorted, "but it is too tight-fitting and
shows the contours of the body."

Al-Mundhir bought another dress that met with her approval and she accepted it.

If the above incidents and aspects of Asmaa's life may easily be forgotten,
then her final meeting with her son, Abdullah, must remain one of the most
unforgettable moments in early Muslim history. At that meeting she demonstrated
the keenness of her intelligence, her resoluteness and the strength of her
faith.

Abdullah was in the running for the Caliphate after the death of Yazid ibn
Mu'awiyah. The Hijaz, Egypt, Iraq, Khurasan and much of Syria were favourable
to him and acknowledged him as the Caliph. The Ummayyads however continued to
contest the Caliphate and to field a massive army under the command of
Al-Hajjaj ibn Yusuf ath-Thaqafi. Relentless battles were fought between the two
sides during which Abdullah ibn az-Zubayr displayed great acts of courage and
heroism. Many of his supporters however could not withstand the continuous
strain of battle and gradually began to desert him. Finally he sought refuge in
the Sacred Mosque at Makkah. It was then that he went to his mother, now an old
blind woman, and said:

"Peace be on you, Mother, and the mercy and blessings of God."

"Unto you be peace, Abdullah," she replied. "What is it that brings you here at
this hour while boulders from Hajjaj's catapults are raining down on your
soldiers in the Haram and shaking the houses of Makkah?" "I came to seek your
advice," he said.

"To seek my advice?" she asked in astonishment. "About what?"

"The people have deserted me out of fear of Hajjaj or being tempted by what he
has to offer. Even my children and my family have left me. There is only a
small group of men with me now and however strong and steadfast they are they
can only resist for an hour or two more. Messengers of the Banu Umayyah (the
Umayyads) are now negotiating with me, offering to give me whatever wordly
possessions I want, should I lay down my arms and swear allegiance to Abdul
Malik ibn Marwan. What do you think?"

Raising her voice, she replied:

"It's your affair, Abdullah, and you know yourself better. If however you think
that you are right and that you are standing up for the Truth, then persevere
and fight on as your companions who were killed under your flag had shown
perseverance. If however you desire the world, what a miserable wretch you are.
You would have destroyed yourself and you would have destroyed your men."

"But I will be killed today, there is no doubt about it."

"That is better for you than that you should surrender yourself to Hajjaj
voluntarily and that some minions of Banu Umayyah should play with your head."

"I do not fear death. I am only afraid that they will mutilate me."

"There is nothing after death that man should be afraid of. Skinning does not
cause any pain to the slaughtered sheep."

Abdullah's face beamed as he said:

"What a blessed mother! Blessed be your noble qualities! I have come to you at
this hour to hear what I have heard. God knows that I have not weakened or
despaired. He is witness over me that I have not stood up for what I have out
of love for this world and its attractions but only out of anger for the sake
of God. His limits have been transgressed. Here am I, going to what is pleasing
to you. So if I am killed, do not grieve for me and commend me to God."

"I shall grieve for you," said the ageing but resolute Asmaa, "only if you are
killed in a vain and unjust cause."

"Be assured that your son has not supported an unjust cause, nor committed any
detestable deed, nor done any injustice to a Muslim or a Dhimmi and that there
is nothing better in his sight than the pleasure of God, the Mighty, the Great.
I do not say this to exonerate myself. God knows that I have only said it to
make your heart firm and steadfast. "

"Praise be to God who has made you act according to what He likes and according
fo what I like. Come close to me, my son, that I may smell and feel your body
for this might be the last meeting with you."

Abdullah knelt before her. She hugged him and smothered his head, his face and
his neck with kisses. Her hands began to squeeze his body when suddenly she
withdrew them and asked:

"What is this you are wearing, Abdullah?"

"This is my armour plate."

"This, my son, ls not the dress of one who desires martyrdom. Take it off. That
will make your movements lighter and quicker. Wear instead the sirwal (a long
under garment) so that if you are killed your 'awrah will not be exposed.

Abdullah took off his armour plate and put on the sirwal. As he left for the
Haram to join the fighting he said:

"My mother, don't deprive me of your dada (prayer)."

Raising her hands to heaven, she prayed:

"O Lord, have mercy on his staying up for long hours and his loud crying in the
darkness of the night while people slept . . .

"O Lord, have mercy on his hunger and his thirst on his journeys from Madinah
and Makkah while he fasted . . .

"O Lord, bless his righteousness to his mother and his father . . .

"O Lord, I commend him to Your cause and I am pleased with whatever You decree
for him. And grant me for his sake the reward of those who are patient and who
persevere."

By sunset, Abdullah was dead. Just over ten days later, his mother joined him.
She was a hundred years old. Age had not made her infirm nor blunted the
keenness of her mind.
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