Subj:   reflections on my sister
From: delmen1@umbc.edu (M. Elmenshawy)


as-salaamu 3alaikum warahmat ullah:

i watched with a muted sadness as the satellite broadcasted pictures
without words--a news program justly titled "NO COMMENT", bringing raw
camera footage of recent news events, without any vocal commentary.

already having heard the news summary for the day, i new immediately from
the first camera frame, the horror which i was experiencing...

two connected pools of muslim blood spilled on the pavement scattered like
a dropped glass of milk.  a woman--perhaps a mother--covering her mouth
with one hand, paralyzed in disbelief--unable to react, her hand wavering
in a state of shock, her eyes unable to shed tears...

a young man--perhaps a brother--clutches his hair frantically yelling
across the street at something off-screen.  another man--a father--in a
desperate and vain but ever hopeful effort, rushes her body into the back
seat of his car.  but her time had come, and the angel was waiting for her
soul...

the frantic brother turns around and explosively kicks the wall standing
behind him, not knowing how else to vent his despair...

a white armored personnel carrier, painted with black block letters "u"
and "n" with helpless and uninvolved spectators, sits parked on the
opposite corner...

her mother cries out "why did you have to go?? you were so young and
innocent!!", while her sister, sitting in her dead sister's room in a
river of tears, clutches one of her sister's dolls, combing her hair, in a
desperate attempt to hold on to her sister that was now gone...

another 11-year-old bosnian muslim girl is dead, shot in the head by
another serb sniper in sarajevo.  her name was Mirella.  she was the
sister of 1 billion muslims worldwide.  she was MY sister.  i watched in
utter despair as my sister was being rushed off to her grave.  may Allah
grant her the status of a martyr and make her grave a garden from the
gardens of Heaven...

her coffin was a simple board of wood, on top of which she layed.  she was
passed from man to man on her short journey to her new home until the Day
of Judgment, each one eager to contribute to the honor of helping her
reach her resting place, despite the almost visibly negligible weight due
to her small size and young age.  just before laying her white shrouded
body into the earth, her father uncovered her forhead, and as a lock of
her hair appeared from behind her shroud, gave her a final loving,
farewell kiss, as she was lowered into the dirt, returning from where we
all originated, and to where we all shall return...

suddenly my heart shuddered at the fear of being asked by Allah--WHAT DID
YOU DO FOR YOUR SISTER??  right now, i can only bow my head in shame, for
whatever tears have been shed or money has been thrown or efforts have
been made, nothing ever seems like enough.  [may Allah reward those who
are making whatever efforts they can]

the ironic paradox, in a twisted way, is that she is one of the lucky
ones--she was not one of the ones who suffered one of the unspeakable,
abhorable, inhuman atrocities we've all heard time and time again so often
we are starting to become numb.  the other part of the irony--she was
playing with Croatian and Serbian friends at the time.  her father had
warned her to stay close to the house, and she obeyed dutifully; but as
Allah has promised, once a person's time has come, nothing will delay it
nor precipitate its early arrrival by even an hour.

gone are the days when the honor and respect of a muslim was sacred--when
the sahabi, at the sight of a jew in the market-place who was harassing a
muslim woman and attempted to lift her jilbab, rose immediately and killed
the perpetrator, only to suffer the same in return.

there are so many one can find to blame--serbs, for their savagery and
vile crimes which i cannot even label as animal for fear of insulting
animals; muslim governments, for waiting for permission from the west to
allow the muslims to defend themselves; the muslims who live under them,
for accepting them; the west, for blatant and unapologetic bias and
hypocrisy towards islam and the muslims; the jews (we always have to blame
them in one way or another)...

but for the time being the most important person to blame is myself, for
not doing enough.  may Allah grant me and the rest of the muslims the
resolve to do more.  not just for our brothers and sisters in bosnia and
elsewhere... but for the improvement of the state and condition of islam
and the muslims in general.

- Maged