Who Practices Polygamy
III&E Brochure Series; No. 13
(published by The Institute of Islamic Information and Education (III&E)
and reproduced with permission)
----------------------------
WHO PRACTICES POLYGAMY?
Polygamy has been practiced by mankind for thousands of years. Many of the
ancient Israelites were polygamous, some having hundreds of wives. King
Solomon (peace be upon him) is said to have had seven hundred wives and
three hundred concubines. David (Dawood) had ninety-nine and Jacob (Yacub,
peace be upon them both) had four. Advice given by some Jewish wise men
state that no man should marry more than four wives. No early society put
any restrictions on the number of wives or put any conditions about how
they were to be treated. Jesus was not known to have spoken against
polygamy. As recently as the seventeenth century, polygamy was practiced
and accepted by the Christian Church. The Mormons (Church of Jesus Christ
of Latter Day Saints) has allowed and practiced polygamy in the United
States.
Monogamy was introduced into Christianity at the time of Paul when many
revisions took place in Christianity. This was done in order for the
church to conform to the Greco-Roman culture where men were monogamous but
owned many slaves who were free for them to use: in other words,
unrestricted polygamy.
Early Christians invented ideas that women were "full of sin" and man was
better off to "never marry." Since this would be the end of mankind these
same people compromised and said "marry only one."
In the American society many times when relations are strained, the husband
simply deserts his wife. The he cohabits with a prostitute or other
immoral woman without marriage. Actually there are three kinds of polygamy
practiced in Western societies: (1) serial polygamy, that is, marriage,
divorce, marriage, divorce, and so on any number of times; (2) a man
married to one woman but having and supporting one or more mistresses; (3)
an unmarried man having a number of mistresses. Islam condones but
discourages the first and forbids the other two.
Wars cause the number of women to greatly exceed the number of men. In a
monogamous society these women, left without husbands or support, resort to
prostitution, illicit relationships with married men resulting in
illegitimate children with no responsibility on the part of the father, or
lonely spinsterhood or widowhood.
Some Western men take the position that monogamy protects the rights of
women. But are these men really concerned about the rights of women? The
society has so many practices which exploit and suppress women, leading to
women's liberation movements from the suffragettes of the early twentieth
century to the feminists of today.
The truth of the matter is that monogamy protects men, allowing them to
"play around" without responsibility. Easy birth control and easy legal
abortion has opened the door of illicit sex to woman and she has been lured
into the so-called sexual revolution. But she is still the one who suffers
the trauma of abortion and the side effects of the birth control methods.
Taking aside the plagues of venereal disease, herpes and AIDS, the male
continues to enjoy himself free of worry. Men are the ones protected by
monogamy while women continue to be victims of men's desires. Polygamy is
very much opposed by the male dominated society because it would force men
to face up to responsibility and fidelity. It would force them to take
responsibility for their polygamous inclinations and would protect and
provide for women and children.
Among all the polygamous societies in history there were none which limited
the number of wives. All of the relationships were unrestricted. In
Islam, the regulations concerning polygamy limit the number of wives a man
can have while making him responsible for all of the women involved.
"Marry women of your choice, two or three or four; but if you fear that you
shall not be able to deal justly with them, then only one or one that your
right hands possess. That will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing
injustice." (Qur'an 4:3)
This verse from the Qur'an allows a man to marry more than one woman but
only if he can deal justly with them. Another verse says that a person is
unable to deal justly between wives, thus giving permission but
discouraging.
"You will never be able to deal justly between wives however much you
desire (to do so). But (if you have more than one wife) do not turn
altogether away (from one), leaving her in suspense..." (Qur'an 4:129)
While the provision for polygamy makes the social system flexible enough to
deal with all kinds of conditions, it is not necessarily recommended or
preferred by Islam. Taking the example of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be
upon him) is instructive. He was married to one woman, Khadijah, for
twenty-five years. It was only after her death when he had reached the age
of fifty that he entered into other marriages to promote friendships,
create alliances or to be an example of some lesson to the community; also
to show the Muslims how to treat their spouses under different conditions
of life.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) was given inspiration from Allah about how
to deal with multiple marriages and the difficulties encountered therein.
It is not an easy matter for a man to handle two wives, two families, and
two households and still be just between the two. No man of reasonable
intelligence would enter into this situation without a great deal of
thought and very compelling reasons (other than sexual).
Some people have said that the first wife must agree to the second
marriage. Others have said that the couple can put it into the marriage
contract that the man will not marry a second wife. First of all, neither
the Qur'an nor Hadith state that the first wife need be consulted at all
concerning a second marriage let alone gain her approval. Consideration
and compassion on the part of the man for his first wife should prompt him
to discuss the matter with her but he is not required to do so or to gain
her approval. Secondly, the Qur'an has explicitly given permission for a
man to marry "two or three or four." No one has the authority to make a
contract forbidding something that has been granted by Allah.
The bottom line in the marriage relationship is good morality and
happiness, creating a just and cohesive society where the needs of men and
women are well taken care of. The present Western society, which permits
free sex between consenting adults, has given rise to an abundance of
irresponsible sexual relationships, an abundance of "fatherless" children,
many unmarried teenage mothers; all becoming a burden on the country's
welfare system. In part, such an undesirable welfare burden has given rise
to bloated budget deficits which even an economically powerful country like
the United States cannot accommodate. Bloated budget deficits have become
a political football which is affecting the political system of the United
States.
In short, we find that artificially created monogamy has become a factor in
ruining the family structure, and the social, economic and political
systems of the country.
It must be a prophet, and indeed it was Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon
him) who directed Muslims to get married or observe patience until one gets
married. 'Abdullah b. Mas'ud reported Allah's messenger as saying, "Young
man, those of you who can support a wife should marry, for it keeps you
from looking at strange women and preserves you from immorality; but those
who cannot should devote themselves to fasting, for it is a means of
suppressing sexual desire." (Bukhari and Muslim)
Islam wants people to be married and to develop a good family structure.
Also Islam realizes the requirements of the society and the individual in
special circumstances where polygamy can be the solution to problems.
Therefore, Islam has allowed polygamy, limiting the number of wives to
four, but does not require or even recommend polygamy.
In the Muslim societies of our times, polygamy is not frequently practiced
despite legal permission in many countries. It appears that the American
male is very polygamous, getting away with not taking responsibility for
the families he should be responsible for.
--Mary Ali
(NOTE: In this article polygamy has been used to mean polygyny meaning
having two or more wives. Islam forbids polyandry meaning having two or
more husbands.)
---------------------
INTRODUCTION OF III&E
The Institute of Islamic Information and Education (III&E) is dedicated to
the cause of Islam in North America through striving to elevate the image
of Islam and Muslims by providing the correct information about Islamic
beliefs, history and civilization from the authentic sources. Enquiries
are welcome.
For more information please contact:
The Institute of Islamic Information and Education
P.O. Box 41129
Chicago, IL 60641-0129 U.S.A.
___________________________
62JOHNSON@CUA.EDU
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Date: Mon, 8 Aug 1994 14:00:58 -0600
From: mahmed@xnet.com (M. Ahmed)
Subject: 13. Who Practices Polygamy?
III&E Brochure Series; No. 13
(published by The Institute of Islamic Information and Education (III&E)
and reproduced with permission)
----------------------------
WHO PRACTICES POLYGAMY?
Polygamy has been practiced by mankind for thousands of years. Many of the
ancient Israelites were polygamous, some having hundreds of wives. King
Solomon (peace be upon him) is said to have had seven hundred wives and
three hundred concubines. David (Dawood) had ninety-nine and Jacob (Yacub,
peace be upon them both) had four. Advice given by some Jewish wise men
state that no man should marry more than four wives. No early society put
any restrictions on the number of wives or put any conditions about how
they were to be treated. Jesus was not known to have spoken against
polygamy. As recently as the seventeenth century, polygamy was practiced
and accepted by the Christian Church. The Mormons (Church of Jesus Christ
of Latter Day Saints) has allowed and practiced polygamy in the United
States.
Monogamy was introduced into Christianity at the time of Paul when many
revisions took place in Christianity. This was done in order for the
church to conform to the Greco-Roman culture where men were monogamous but
owned many slaves who were free for them to use: in other words,
unrestricted polygamy.
Early Christians invented ideas that women were "full of sin" and man was
better off to "never marry." Since this would be the end of mankind these
same people compromised and said "marry only one."
In the American society many times when relations are strained, the husband
simply deserts his wife. The he cohabits with a prostitute or other
immoral woman without marriage. Actually there are three kinds of polygamy
practiced in Western societies: (1) serial polygamy, that is, marriage,
divorce, marriage, divorce, and so on any number of times; (2) a man
married to one woman but having and supporting one or more mistresses; (3)
an unmarried man having a number of mistresses. Islam condones but
discourages the first and forbids the other two.
Wars cause the number of women to greatly exceed the number of men. In a
monogamous society these women, left without husbands or support, resort to
prostitution, illicit relationships with married men resulting in
illegitimate children with no responsibility on the part of the father, or
lonely spinsterhood or widowhood.
Some Western men take the position that monogamy protects the rights of
women. But are these men really concerned about the rights of women? The
society has so many practices which exploit and suppress women, leading to
women's liberation movements from the suffragettes of the early twentieth
century to the feminists of today.
The truth of the matter is that monogamy protects men, allowing them to
"play around" without responsibility. Easy birth control and easy legal
abortion has opened the door of illicit sex to woman and she has been lured
into the so-called sexual revolution. But she is still the one who suffers
the trauma of abortion and the side effects of the birth control methods.
Taking aside the plagues of venereal disease, herpes and AIDS, the male
continues to enjoy himself free of worry. Men are the ones protected by
monogamy while women continue to be victims of men's desires. Polygamy is
very much opposed by the male dominated society because it would force men
to face up to responsibility and fidelity. It would force them to take
responsibility for their polygamous inclinations and would protect and
provide for women and children.
Among all the polygamous societies in history there were none which limited
the number of wives. All of the relationships were unrestricted. In
Islam, the regulations concerning polygamy limit the number of wives a man
can have while making him responsible for all of the women involved.
"Marry women of your choice, two or three or four; but if you fear that you
shall not be able to deal justly with them, then only one or one that your
right hands possess. That will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing
injustice." (Qur'an 4:3)
This verse from the Qur'an allows a man to marry more than one woman but
only if he can deal justly with them. Another verse says that a person is
unable to deal justly between wives, thus giving permission but
discouraging.
"You will never be able to deal justly between wives however much you
desire (to do so). But (if you have more than one wife) do not turn
altogether away (from one), leaving her in suspense..." (Qur'an 4:129)
While the provision for polygamy makes the social system flexible enough to
deal with all kinds of conditions, it is not necessarily recommended or
preferred by Islam. Taking the example of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be
upon him) is instructive. He was married to one woman, Khadijah, for
twenty-five years. It was only after her death when he had reached the age
of fifty that he entered into other marriages to promote friendships,
create alliances or to be an example of some lesson to the community; also
to show the Muslims how to treat their spouses under different conditions
of life.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) was given inspiration from Allah about how
to deal with multiple marriages and the difficulties encountered therein.
It is not an easy matter for a man to handle two wives, two families, and
two households and still be just between the two. No man of reasonable
intelligence would enter into this situation without a great deal of
thought and very compelling reasons (other than sexual).
Some people have said that the first wife must agree to the second
marriage. Others have said that the couple can put it into the marriage
contract that the man will not marry a second wife. First of all, neither
the Qur'an nor Hadith state that the first wife need be consulted at all
concerning a second marriage let alone gain her approval. Consideration
and compassion on the part of the man for his first wife should prompt him
to discuss the matter with her but he is not required to do so or to gain
her approval. Secondly, the Qur'an has explicitly given permission for a
man to marry "two or three or four." No one has the authority to make a
contract forbidding something that has been granted by Allah.
The bottom line in the marriage relationship is good morality and
happiness, creating a just and cohesive society where the needs of men and
women are well taken care of. The present Western society, which permits
free sex between consenting adults, has given rise to an abundance of
irresponsible sexual relationships, an abundance of "fatherless" children,
many unmarried teenage mothers; all becoming a burden on the country's
welfare system. In part, such an undesirable welfare burden has given rise
to bloated budget deficits which even an economically powerful country like
the United States cannot accommodate. Bloated budget deficits have become
a political football which is affecting the political system of the United
States.
In short, we find that artificially created monogamy has become a factor in
ruining the family structure, and the social, economic and political
systems of the country.
It must be a prophet, and indeed it was Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon
him) who directed Muslims to get married or observe patience until one gets
married. 'Abdullah b. Mas'ud reported Allah's messenger as saying, "Young
man, those of you who can support a wife should marry, for it keeps you
from looking at strange women and preserves you from immorality; but those
who cannot should devote themselves to fasting, for it is a means of
suppressing sexual desire." (Bukhari and Muslim)
Islam wants people to be married and to develop a good family structure.
Also Islam realizes the requirements of the society and the individual in
special circumstances where polygamy can be the solution to problems.
Therefore, Islam has allowed polygamy, limiting the number of wives to
four, but does not require or even recommend polygamy.
In the Muslim societies of our times, polygamy is not frequently practiced
despite legal permission in many countries. It appears that the American
male is very polygamous, getting away with not taking responsibility for
the families he should be responsible for.
--Mary Ali
(NOTE: In this article polygamy has been used to mean polygyny meaning
having two or more wives. Islam forbids polyandry meaning having two or
more husbands.)
---------------------
INTRODUCTION OF III&E
The Institute of Islamic Information and Education (III&E) is dedicated to
the cause of Islam in North America through striving to elevate the image
of Islam and Muslims by providing the correct information about Islamic
beliefs, history and civilization from the authentic sources. Enquiries
are welcome.
For more information please contact:
The Institute of Islamic Information and Education
P.O. Box 41129
Chicago, IL 60641-0129 U.S.A.